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10 Awesomely Ridiculous 80s & 90s Fancy Dress Ideas For Kids

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Halloween is here any minute now and with that comes watching Hocus Pocus on loop whilst being wrapped under 14 blankets on the sofa. Your phone is beeping but you’re still casually ignoring your Whatsapp messages of some Keen Ken who is trying to organise a Halloween party that you have no interest in because a) that requires leaving your house! And b) fun doesn’t live here anymore!

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So, what do you do to get yourself in the mood for all things spectacularly spooky? Dress up a small person in a fancy-dress costume from your childhood of course! Why? Because you’re an adult and they have zero say in the matter. Plus, imagine all the Instagram worthy photos you can take of your little darling purely for the entertainment of you and your friends! #parentinggoals

Goonies Sloth

Hey You Guuuuuuuuys! The Goonies is a classic 80s film that only fools would find something wrong with. Persuade your child to ditch the latest superhero character that all their friends are imitating. (And if they begin to have a full-on meltdown at your dictatorship, tell them that one of their toys is possessed by the spirit of a maniacal, disfigured, Japanese, orphaned, drug addict, who will haunt them in their sleep if they don’t get their shit together!) Encourage your little ones to stand out from the crowd and be their own superhero… let them be SLOTH! Yes, he’s not as handsome as Captain America and he can’t lunge real low like The Black Widow, but Sloth CAN save a bunch of entitled kids on a pirate ship! So, your move Marvel! 

Stay Puft Marshmallow Man

The original Ghostbusters is a solid 1980s benchmark of a movie that lives in the memory of every 80s child. Especially every 80s child who was Forest Gumping their way through puberty and felt sexually intrigued by Dana/Zuul.

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The cast ensemble is superb, the concept is amazingly bizarre, and it spawned many young folks boldly declaring that they wanted to be a Ghostbuster when they grew up! However, don’t go for the obvious with this fancy dress outfit as that’s too easy. Go for the one character in the film that nearly destroyed New York City. It’s all about the Stay Puft Marshmallow Man!


This little Italian plumber has been kicking around since 1981 and is one of the most recognisable faces when it comes to retro gaming and Nintendo. I know your child probably doesn’t care enough and is flipping you the finger whilst scrolling through their expensive iPad you bought to pacify them, but this fancy dress costume should win prizes! And if it doesn’t, then I think a strongly worded letter to whoever is in charge of this shit show of a fancy-dress competition should do it!

Oompa Loompa

Raise your hand if you feel personally victimised by the strangeness of the original Oompa Loompas from Willy Wonka’s chocolate factory?! (And yes, I am fully aware that this is from the 1971 film but this was a staple in my childhood so I’m ignoring it!) Now if these small strange beings still make you feel ever so nervous, then this Halloween outfit for kids will work out perfectly for your small person. I’m also fairly certain the bright orange face paints will ruin all your soft furnishings in the house… but that’s what you signed up for with this parenting gig! Destruction and mayhem.


I mean. Just look! This Halloween costume is perfect for babies and toddlers because they get to work the cute factor while simultaneously having no idea what the hell is going on! The words Star Wars are just incoherent sounds to an infant, but to those indoctrinated into the way of The Force, this is geek goals! If anything, this Yoda fancy dress costume is enough to make us all point, laugh and coo “that’s adoooorable!” while your small child laughs at the ceiling, cries for no reason and shits themselves.

Chucky Doll

I’m not going to lie. I’ve watched maybe 10 minutes of the film Child’s Play and decided that it was a magnificently giant NO from me because I just can’t cope! We all know the horror story of how a doll comes to life and murders people just for LOLS, so why not bring the essence of an iconic slasher movie to the youths of today!

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If dressing your child as a serial killer is not your bag, but you wish to drown them in glorious memories from your childhood, then The Very Hungry Caterpillar is a pacifists dream! Where we lack in scares, we gain in cuteness! This was a favourite book of mine when I was a kid and now as an adult I only have respect and admiration for a gluttonous caterpillar who eats its way to beauty! #FitLife #FitFam

Edward Scissorhands

This Tim Burton fantasy costume is always a fab go-to when it comes to Halloween. It’s a quintessential look that is easily identifiable, and if it’s pulled off then it’s just the right shade of scary… but in a friendly hairdresser kinda way! Although Edward Scissorhands is meant to be male, this outfit is re-imagined for a girl because sometimes us ladies want to look dark and cool. (Not covered in pink or frills or… projecting heteronormative gender roles!)


Another Tim Burton dark comedy classic that does the rounds every Halloween. Beetlejuice is a much-loved movie that scared the crap out of me as a child but also made me love it in equal measure. It’s time to make your little ones decide if the smutty, crude, poltergeist will actually scar their tiny impressionable minds, or will they embrace him and laugh out loud. Nervous laughter is also ok! Either way, this fancy dress outfit is all kinds of awesome and needs to be seen!

Toby From Labyrinth

You remind me of the babe! If your child is not even walking yet and you want to participate in the peer pressure Halloween dress up but you’re feeling incredibly lazy, then this stripy onesie is a winner! Toby is the baby from the definitive 80s film Labyrinth and he is the reason why shit gets real and people nearly die in order to save him… while he’s off having his jollies with the Goblin King David Bowie! You can dress your cute person in this red stripy number and recklessly throw him or her around the living room whilst dancing! Fun.

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13 Of The Best Classic Board Games

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There’s nothing like a little ‘friendly’ competitiveness when it comes to board games! I have many 'fond' memories of caravan holidays, pretending to be the Waltons family… huddled around a poxy folding table and knocking out a game of Connect 4! I mean, what else are you to do when it’s the Great British summer and it’s pissing rain?! Board games were a staple in my childhood throughout the 80s and 90s. And even now there's a resurgence! People have jumped on the nostalgia of playing classic board games with iconic TV shows or films we all loved from yesteryear.

Oooohhh sparkly retro-tastic memories!  Check them out here! 

Oooohhh sparkly retro-tastic memories! Check them out here! 

Now throw a little alcohol in the mix and you’ve got yourself a perfect night in! With a little throwback to those ‘fun’ times when tables were overturned in game rage, dead legs and Chinese burns were inflicted by older siblings just because you were winning… I've compiled a list of the top 13 classic board games that are timeless. Unlike me, myself and copious amounts of grey hairs!



The word game that will usually make you look like a fecking illiterate idiot if you’re not careful! You lost me at double and triple scores because I generally couldn’t care for your nonsensical words. I acknowledge your supreme status as a classic board game, but that doesn’t mean that I have to like you!



I once attempted to play this game with a friend in a Norwegian café. Cool story bro! We didn’t know the rules so kind of guessed them. And then half way through the game we found another dice in the box that I’m fairly sure we needed at the beginning! I spent most of the time randomly shouting “YAHTZEE!” because it made me feel like I was somewhat invested in our made-up game!

Connect 4

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This game is either really quick and fun or long and really boring. There is no in between! If you’re playing someone who is quite good at it, then the game will go on forever until you run out of counters, you’re hungry and have forgotten why you decided that it was a good idea to play in the first place! However, if you’re playing your 4-year-old nephew who just likes the colour red with zero concept of the game, then it’s always amusing beating a small child at a game!

Trivial Pursuit

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This game is just a quiz and the board and pieces are just a wild ruse to make you feel like it’s entertaining. It’s not. This game always seemed like homework which was never any fun. “What bird is named after the Ugandan word for photosynthesis??” Ugh! Stop trying to make my brain learn new things!


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Whichever variation you played of the games they both can be described as ‘definitely not chess.’ This traditional board game felt like chess for dummies, so naturally I quite enjoyed it! It made me feel sophisticated when the rules of chess flew right over my head.


This board game has to be mentioned despite the fact I never played it growing up because my brain melted when a friend tried to explain the rules to me. Of course, there has to be a reason this classic strategy board game has been kicking around for thousands of years, and still attracts lots of fans. I suppose.

Guess Who

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Now you’re talking! This game provided hours of entertainment. Does she have ginger hair? Does he wear glasses? Does he look like that creepy politician who probably belongs on the sex offender register?? The variations to deduce your opponent’s person were simply endless!


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This was another game that appealed to me. Picking out fiddly body parts from a naked dude with a bulbous red nose was super fun! The only problem was that the small fiddly parts meant that they always went missing so the game was never complete, and you had to substitute the funny bone with a bit of blu-tack!



When you grew up with the Spy File and Sunday afternoons watching Murder, She Wrote and Columbo, Cluedo was always a must-have board game. The rules were very simple: find out who dunnit… the murder weapon used and in which room. I always felt like a smug Poirot bastard announcing, “It was Miss Scarlet, with the lead pipe in the study!”

I loved it. You loved it. We all loved it! 

I loved it. You loved it. We all loved it! 

Ghost Castle

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This board game classic was always on my Christmas wish list to Santa, but I never got it! I did however spend a lot of time playing it at my friend’s house and soon realised that I was more excited about the cool model setup of a haunted castle rather than playing the actual game!

Mouse Trap

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If you have an interactive game with moveable parts, then every kid is going to love it regardless of the rules! Mouse Trap was a cult classic in the board game world. It was bright and fun and looked like something Kevin in Home Alone would setup to piss off some burglars!

Screwball Scramble

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The ultimate obstacle course that required skill rather than strategy. I loved this game! Granted, once you had figured out how to get the chrome ball through the course, the gameplay went dramatically downhill… BUT it was an awesome immersive game that deserves a nod in the memorable board game genre!


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The 83-year-old board game that continues to have a bad reputation for tearing families apart! It is also known as a game that never actually ends. Nobody needs to be aggressively negotiating a hotel on the Old Kent Road for 4 hours of their life! Again, this iconic game was one I played with friends where we blatantly made up the rules because none of us had any idea about buying and trading property. And any 8-year-old who claims to know about resource management is a liar!